Tuesday, October 26, 2004



I had a pretty restless sleep last night.
The books say that now is the time when woman start having those scary baby birth dreams but it was nothing like that at all. I just could not turn my brain off.
There is so much going through my mind and it is getting hard to sort it all out.

It doesn't matter what people say or tell me or any of that but I can not help but worry about Ruth and the kids. They are family. I have even been worrying about Rick's family even though I have never met them. We are all family.

I have this whole Li Visa thing going through my head and I am so stressed about the time it will be finished. I have no control over that and that annoys me more than anything.

I have been a little nervous about how to break the news to my boss and even more nervous about leaving a job with a very good paycheque for NOTHING! That is scary. Scares Li as well.
Li grinds his teeth at night sometimes when there are too many things going on through his head. He has been doing a lot of grinding the last few days since Rick died. There is a lot for him to think about and honestly I think he is having the bad baby dreams that the book says I should be having.

AND to make everything all seem trivial and yet not there was the earthquake.

No I dont know anyone living in Nigata and I have never been there, but it is still terrible. Today, just before lunch they got hit with another one of 6.1 and the TV crews caught all the scary moving. As everyone is sitting in the lunch room watching and commenting I know that they, along with me, and thousands of other Shizuokaites, are saying to themselves - It should have been us.

Really, it should have been.
Nigata was not next on the list for a big earthquake - we were. The Tokai area. Shizuoka prefecture is basically the center of the earthquake that is soooo loooonnngggg over due. Everyone who lives here knows that and the TV is not helping out about it either. I have noticed that the topic of an earthquake here has not been talked about by anyone. We all seem to not want to talk about it. I know I dont.

I generally dont like being a pessimist when it comes to things like the earthquake but we really should have been next. After the tremor about 2 months ago I told myself it was time to put together an earthquake safety bag in the outside tiny shed.
I never did.
I think I really am this time. Our time in Japan is so short now that it is really very stupid of me to risk it.
I think I will do this on Saturday, as Li has to work and he hates pessimist thinking. He NEVER goes into the shed so I can tuck it all away from him and he will never know. Sneak some money out of the bank in small bills and wrap it in plastic for a day I hope never comes.
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Posted by (Top)Andrea::10/26/2004 :: 0 Comments:

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